Day one. 14.10.11

Friday. Fridays are always so werid for me. My lessons are all swapped around from what they usually are all the other days so in my first lesson i feel like its going to be break after. BUT ITS NOT. Its tragic it really is. P.E is a chor... i like it for the first 10mins then i just can't be dealing with it. And for some reason i got an award for effort in it last year :L... well i do do 50 situps a night  ;) yeah bitches!! :L Things with friends right now are a bit pear shaped.... pht.. talk about thereselves feeling like a third wheel...you can't feel more third wheel than i do right now seriously. I mean whats up with that? Your friends with someone for like the whole time your at a school and then smack. You just get ditched and kinda left behind and left out. You'd think you'd be able to go to the prom with your bestfriend without feeling like your intruding.. Yeah so, that sucks. Can't wait to go to college.. i just want to meet new people it'll be so awesome! New friends, new place, just a new start in genral :) At least i hope... it could go completely wrong and i'll end up being the nerd that sits in a corner with no one else and eats their lunch because no one else will sit with them... LETS THINK POSITIVE THO SHALL WE??!?!?!? infact actually what if there arn't even people their i want to be friends with? This whole life business isnt very easy. I'm determined to find someone awesome who thinks im awesome and'll play xbox with me and be like BOOM HEADSHOT. And other stuff of course :L... God had to do an English assesment today. To be quite honest i think i've written a big papery piece of shit. Hopefully i'll get that A tho :L Been depressedish all day actually.. i have my reasons but one of them is so stupid and i want to ignore it so i get over it. On the heart break agendar of my life im still not over the.. current? events of the past. (yeah that didnt make sense oh well :L). Its so awkward watching your x's mini me walking about school just like he used to... sometimes i can't really look it hurts so much. More on that as emotional circumstance is pushed over the edge. Even more awkward is when your trying to write a CV and have to list achievements and you have NOTHING. Apart from grade one passed in kung fu so i can kick ass my work friends. Thats helpful.  Why is every other girl in my school gotta stomach that doesnt stick out as much as mine? Am i a pig? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY??? I go in those changing rooms and they're all like chopping boards! WTF?!?!?!?! OH im sorry i refuse to eat like a rabbit for the rest of my fucking life. But still its not like i dont do any exercise. But why? why why why? I'm just fat. Ok. There. I've come to terms with it. After this post i think im going to go make myself throw up in the loo :L jokes. Well im trying to think of something else that happened today buuuuut i cant really think of anything so i guess this is where i finish up for now. Lucky you eh? OH wait, the awkward moment when you poke your other x on facebook and it tells you they havent yet recieved your other poke. I think everyone gets that message. Oh well who needs someone that gave you a Stupid excuse for leaving you. THERE i said it! i feel rather good now :L Goodnight!